When in doubt about STD, it’s best to just tell
Posted on | April 23, 2007 | No Comments
I’m a single, straight man. I was recently told by my last lover that she has HPV. By implication, I probably have it as well. From the Centers for Disease Control site (www.cdc.gov), I learned that at least 50 percent of all sexually active adults get this buggy at some point, and that, by age 50, 80 percent of women will have been infected. I learned there is no test for men. I learned that condoms probably do not stop this infection (but may help). I learned that it can be a serious issue for women and is linked with cervical cancer.
To summarize, I can’t be sure I have it, most people get it, and there’s nothing I can do to stop it short of staying celibate. I want to do the right thing, but am not sure what that is. What is the ethics of disclosure for my next lover?
To Tell or Not to Tell
Dear Tell: Tell. That way, she’ll know to be diligent with her Pap tests, which she should be anyway, especially with a new partner; she’ll also know to discuss current HPV strategies—DNA testing, the cervical cancer vaccine—with her doctor, since there may have been progress since she last checked, assuming she ever did. (Anyone who hasn’t done the homework, get to it: the American Social Health Association, www.ashastd.org, is another good resource.)
And, you’ll know whether she’s got her head screwed on as well as you do, by seeing if her response to this news is as sane, responsible and nonjudgmental as yours. Nice work.
Source: Carolyn Hax via The Charlotte Observer
Tags: cancer, cervical cancer, HPV, pap smear
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